Genderqueer 2 genderqueer's Blog

god is dead

Posted in Uncategorized by genderqueer2genderqueer on March 31, 2010

God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it? – Friedrich Nietzsche.

Note, links in this post may not be safe for work, and may contain confronting pictures, and medical procedure descriptions.

I am not a fan of gatekeepers, I am not a fan of doctors who appoint themselves as experts on transgender lives while often knowing very little about us. I wrote about this before, but I went back and forth about writing this piece because I fundamentally like doctors, not when they are choosing who gets to transition and who doesn’t, but when they are supporting their patients, doing blood tests, keeping an eye out of the things that can go wrong, and this is something that people who transtion, or seek medical realated gender treatments out side of the medical system often miss out on.

But they still do it. (NSFW, genital pictures) If you have a choice I would strongly strongly recommend going to a doctor not a cutter, but not everyone has that choice, I remember a women I knew online who was in the US, facing the lost of health insurance and trying to get an Orchiectomy, so that loosing access to health insurance wouldn’t mean having to risk further masculinization. The surgery got pushed back several times and she considered doing it herself. This post is written for her, and for young trans people like her, scared, without support or resources, considering desperate measures. I wrote it because none of these things are hypothetical.

Many people who do medically transtion start hormones before they start the medical process, either by getting birthcontrol pills or HRT from female friends or relatives, or ordering homones online, or for trans men, using the same sources that bodybuilders and the gym crowd access steroids. If you are going down this road, try not to share needles, many places have needle exchanges where you can get no questions asked injecting equipment, if you can’t access new injecting equitment bleach will lower the risk of infection

To avoid the doctors, we must become doctors ourselves, if you are in a position like this, read everything you can, if you can find people to talk to, talk to them. and good luck.



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